{best recovery formula - my recipe}

so... I started doing insanity (shaun T's workout program) two weeks ago today. So far so good. It originated with a phone call on my work phone asking me if I wanted to be a part of a weight loss bet at work. The person to lose the highest percentage of weight loss in two months would win $400. I'm always up for a new challenge, and being very competative and nocturnal (not by choice but becuase I work night shift) I thought it could be a fun new healthy hobby. Plus, every since my last semester in college and then studying for my nursing boards and then starting a new job i haven't really paid that much attention to my weight/health. Not to say I've let myself go, but I didn't stress about it, ate what I wanted to eat and exercised occasionally. I have been the same weight (fluctuating +/- 8 lbs ish) since high school, but it was time to start taking better care of myself and win some cash :)...

let me start off by saying that I have not worked out worked out for like 2 years now... and that insanity is supposedly "the hardest workout ever put on DVD". Why I get these ideas I have no idea... but with its promise to transform your body in 60 days, lose weight, tone up, etc. I thought it would be a good investment to keep me motivated and succeed at my new hobby of health. (can health be a hobby?) -{detour: some of us nurses are some of the most unhealthy ppl around. Since finishing college I have had to learn what to do with all of my free time. Nursing school is no joke, it was miserable and TONS of work... sucked the life out of you. haha. but really. there was no time for hobbies or anything of the sort. We were lucky to go out every once in awhile. So, since graduating and only working 3 days a week I have been learning what to do with my free time. One of my next posts will be: things to do in the middle of the night when you're bored and awake}-

The first days of insanity, well, even just the fit test, was awful. I mean, you can't breathe are going to throw up, dripping sweat like a faucet awful. The first day I thought I was going to die and seriously considered quitting. When I woke up the second official day I had to look up blogs of people's success stories and read them until I was motivated enough to endure the pain. I also took pictures of fit bodies from pinterest and saved them on my ipad and played a slide show as I worked out... hoping to look at them as motivation. Honestly I'd look over and be like, yeah, I really don't care that much. I'd rather just not eat ever again than do this once more. Sounds dramatic I know, but really, it was rough. I decided to take it one day at a time, never forcing myself to perfection or to look exactly like the professionals (which was growth in and of itself) and do my best. As long as my heart was beating out of my chest and I was sweating... that's been good for me. AND... I'm at week two!! 1/4 of the way there! Since the initial weigh in I have lost 12 lbs... 7.5% of my body weight! exciting! More than that, I can tell that I am stronger and have more endurance. One of the keys to keeping on track has been ... I have been counting calories with myfitnesspal (I know it's tedious) and exercise. So far so good.

Anyway, wow, this post started off with me going to tell about the "recovery formula" I created. haha

So as a part of the fitness regimen you are supposed to drink a recovery formula after you work out. It's supposed to fuel your body, help with the post-hard-workout-starvingness you feel after working out so you don't binge... and I guess help with weight loss. So... as an alternative I had found that chocolate milk was a good substitute for Shaun T's "special" formula (and cheaper). I started with chocolate soy milk and then now I am trying chocolate almond milk (which I like more)... but to make it a protein-boosting meal I added some stuff to the chocolate almond milk in my knockoff magic bullet machine (seriously amazingness, get one). So here was my rather pleasingly delightful recipe:

1 cup dark chocolate almond milk
3 tbsp plain nonfat greek yogurt
3/4 banana
2 tsp natural peanut butter (I used trader joe's)
5 tsp soy protein (could be whey I hear it's better but that's what I had)
Ice to taste/thickness

Blends and wah-la! Seriously after not having hardly anything sweet (other than chocolate milk) this was BOMB. and according to myfitnesspal (also in an ipad/ipod/iphone/android app) only 327 calories... which is a meal but a yummy healthier option than plain-old chocolate milk or worse... ice cream (bad :))... so, I will update with photos soon. Until then, Enjoy! Let me know what you think!

PS I'll keep you posted on my progress... sexy body pics to follow :) (in a couple months) hehe

{humbled}

My life is empty, pointless.
I have nothing to give or offer the world.
I can be nice, sweet, giving, sexual, smart, encouraging, fun, smiley
 - but all of that is nothing if it doesn’t stem from my creator.
I can live life as it is or I can thrive.
I'm standing with two paths in front of me.
One that might be fun and comfortable but
 leaves me a broken mess and a fake liar and hypocrite.
The other is a full life –
one that hurts, is broken, frustrated, discontent.
 I choose the later.
I choose to not know the answers,
to be broken and discontent.
 To struggle and ask questions.
All because I hold on to the truth that my Abba will be walking alongside of me.
That He will place His Spirit in me so lives will be changed.
Not by any of my power but solely by His.
By the Power that brought God to earth and raised Him from the dead.
A Power that heals, restores, and brings abundant life.
I need that Power.
 I can’t live without It.
I feel as if I’m suffocating and starving because
I have not breathed or eaten for so long.
He has brought me to the desert.
And I chose to stay here.
I am convinced that the desert is exactly where I can find Him.
Not in the glamorous Christian bubble (although He’s there) but
where you wouldn’t expect Him.
He is my Rock, my Redeemer and nothing can shake me.
Neither angels nor demons, distance or work, dreams, lust, friends, home, men, sin –
 NO!
I refuse to be confined and I chose to be set free!
Free to live and love and laugh – no matter how cliché.
I want to be swarmed in It.
 I want Him to take me to new alleys of Himself.
I want to truly believe that He is the only way and
that I can put my trust and heart and life in His hands.
 I want to know mysteries and be used.
 But even if all that never comes to be –
I want to be ok with knowing Him.

Him only.

That if every blessing were taken away I would still have a full life.
That if I were to never be “used” again it would be ok
– because I knew –
and not just knew
– but believed and breathed and touched and felt and saw and smelled my Lord.
So I am choosing to no longer conform or perform,
but to live in Love –
to thirst on it and eat it up.
I waste so much time
– there is more than this – I know it!
 I have nothing to lay at your feet, Lord, but myself.
And I am nothing.

{here it goes}

So here it goes... this is my attempt at continuing to challenge and motivate myself to grow and think and not be stagnant. So what inspired this blog beginning? Below is today's Jesus Calling devotional, which, if you don't have this book/app get it --> Jesus Calling by: Sarah Young. Not only is it great because it's written by Sarah with an "h" but it gives you one page to ponder in Jesus' words to you. It has kept me motivated to stay in touch with Jesus and with a consistent guide to leading me into His presence... anyway... here is yesterdays:



Jesus Calling By Sarah Young,  May 1

You are on the path of My choosing. There is no randomness about your life. Here and Now comprise the coordinates of your daily life. Most people let their moments slip through their fingers, half-lived. They avoid the present by worrying about the future or longing for a better time and place. They forget that they are creatures who are subject to the limitations of time and space. They forget their Creator, who walks with them only in the present.

Every moment is alive with My glorious Presence, to those whose hearts are intimately connected with Mine. As you give yourself more and more to a life of constant communion with Me, you will find that you simply have no time for worry. Thus you are freed to let my Spirit direct your steps, enabling you to walk along the path of Peace.

"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?" - Luke 12:25-26

"To shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace." - Luke 1:79



I refuse to life a life to the half. But... I think a lot and never externalize all the plethora of thoughts rolling around in my head, which then get lost in wherever they get lost to. I thought to myself, I really need to get better at writing these down. Sounds simple right? So my goal is to share with whoever you are about where I'm at. In hopes that you can relate or learn or be challenged or teach me something... and if nothing else for me to have a canvas for my heart & head... in hopes that my pondering and examining will allow me to continue to not miss life as it passes by.